ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Randomize
