She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
