She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
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