I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
