Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
