Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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