I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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