found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
Randomize
