question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Randomize
