come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
