First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
