He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
What a dumb baby whore.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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