sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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