Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
