i think i have herpe
just one?
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
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