How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Randomize
