The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
