How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Are my feet made of real feet?
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Randomize
