My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Just high enough for therapy.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
Randomize
