Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
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