talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Randomize
