woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize