yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
