I think I died a long time ago.
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
