I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
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