check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Randomize
