girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
