roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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