I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I think people are normalizing furries
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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