i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
