i already hear my dad disowning me
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Randomize
