is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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