If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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