but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
soo... how was my night?
Randomize
