is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
