Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
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