Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Randomize
