U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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