and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
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