As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
