How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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