He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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