he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Vodka?
Forever.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
