You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
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