Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
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