were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
