Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Oh god it's open bar.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
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