I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
