Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
my liver is dry heaving
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Randomize
