i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
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